Stuff I will Probably Get For My 18th.

Ah, the 18th birthday - the most anticipated birthday anybody will have following the wholly anticlimatic 16th, with the 17th hardly being a cause for celebration. What new scarily adult thing are you legally allowed to do?

...drive a motorized vehicle. Knowing myself - like I do - I do not see myself taking to this particularly well. I like to think I have a reasonable amount of control over my body, and I can use my head when it is absolutely, unavoidably necessary. However - using the two together is not something I have "mastered", so to speak (if you're one of the poor sods who's been made to watch me do "physical theatre"). Being able to synch your head with your body is considered integral for being able to drive.

That's dream of being my high flying career as a F1 Driver put to bed, then.

Anyway, here are the list of things I imagine I will recieve for my 18th birthday:

HOPEFULLY - A drink.

No self-respecting 18 year old should have to buy their own first legal drink. It doesn't even bare thinking about. If I go to a pub with someone on the 5th October (take note, reader) and they say "off you go, go fill up on champers!" without offering to pay for it, I will break down in tears and spread mortifying rumours about aforementioned stingey bastard.

A diary.

Are you a FEMALE?! Are you interested in STUFF?! Then what better way to mark the big 1-8 with a fully fledged DIARY?! Now you're 18, it's essentially a right of passage to own that document to keep a track of all your people-to-see, places-to-be. You're a lady now, ladies have diaries, dontcha' know?

A make up set.

...a wholly insinuating gift. No matter how many years I savagely rip open the wrapping paper and see a dainty little set of eyeshadows or blushers, it doesn't ease the feeling that somebody is trying to break something to me.

A dressing gown and/or slippers.

At the ends of those crazy nights out downing drinks with unpronouncable names, you've gotta catch up on your down-time to rejuvenate that youth you've just left behind. Fluffy and cute, silky and sophisticated - it doens't matter, as long as you look nothing short of fabulous when you're lounging around getting that much-needed "beauty time".

(Even more likely to recieve if:you are regarded as fat.
you do not have a job.
you have a blog.
if you are fat, jobless and have a blog.)